write headlines

I am watching a movie. Battle Beyond the Stars. it was released in 1980, and it kinda combines Dune, Star Wars and The Magnificent Seven. it stars no one I’ve ever heard of, and the inimitable Robert Vaughn — who was in The Magnificent Seven, as a matter of fact! how about that.

now, I know what you’re thinking: with a recipe like that, this flick must be great, right? it must be. well that’s what I thought, too. but oh, if only that were so.

because no. it is terrible, and that’s a bummer. what the hell is Robert Vaughn doing here anyway? I kind of assumed that the man fell on hard times — he even turned up doing television spots for an ambulance chaser a few years back — but I didn’t know he was slumming as far back as the early eighties. it could be that I’m not as caught up on Robert Vaughn’s filmography as I would have believed. so please forgive me. there’s only so much time in the day.

so! the real reason I’m here this evening: in a former life I wrote headlines for a newspaper. you probably knew this. but if I haven’t told you about it — it’s a nightly deadline kinda thing, hunched in front of a computer, in the company of idealists, coffee junkies, slobs, news hounds (I’m probably a little bit of each of these designations, admittedly). this work, it’s a little monotonous. and while I don’t know if I’d recommend it because it doesn’t pay very well, I suppose it worked out for me. sure didn’t feel like it would at the time, but, eh.

but I digress: when I see a good headline, I appreciate it. really! there’s a little bit of art to writing good ones. not enough that you could write a book on the subject, but nevertheless, I saw a headline today on the computer, and oh man, is it a good one. Harry is the wild one, right?

Prince Harry kills Taliban insurgents, also talks Vegas pics

oh yes he is. he’s the wild one in the House of Windsor. but this guy, goddamn. he’s a man. Apache helicopter pilot, gunnin’ insurgents by day; naked, with a bunch of ladies in a Vegas pool by night. Harry gets down. I love that headline. that’s one of the best headlines ever. I’m sure of it.

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1 comment so far

  1. Drustva (@drustva) on

    I almost spit my coffee out reading your last piece about Harry. Ah-mazing.


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