here it comes

politics are coming down the pike. this will require a double.

the Bears won today, barely. Orton fucked up his ankle, and Mike Brown has a calf injury. of course he does.
but we’re on top of the NFC North — suck on that one, Green Bay — and that’s not bad.
I watched the first half before work today at a sports bar. I had the Mile High Nachos (they’re piled Mile High). then, halfway through my evening at work, Frostee run. then, two hours later, two-for-one deal landed me a Big Mac and fries. I hadn’t eaten a Big Mac in at least six, seven years.
I’m not kidding, I don’t think I’ve eaten this poorly in a day in over a year.

okay. a double has been hit.
my newspaper endorsed a straight Republican ticket. already talked about Gilmore, but also McCain, Virgil Goode and Eric Cantor. Goode’s a cartoon of a six-term congressman, who actively deserves to lose. sits on the House appropriations committee, which is a guarantee that he’s both lazy and corrupt. one of his huge issues — and he’s been talking this up — are anchor babies. Goode, of Virginia’s fifth congressional district, is worried about the Mexicans coming here, having kids, and then leeching off of their citizenship to bleed all of us dry.
you’d think we were in Brownsville, fucking Texas, he talks about it so much. his opponent, Tom Perriello, is a lawyer who served as a national security consultant in Afghanistan. but he’s from Albemarle and he doesn’t support a gay marriage ban, so the Goode campaign has depicted him as a hippie. Goode will win, but I can guarantee it won’t be with my help, and it will be a shame.
Cantor’s from suburban Richmond, and isn’t my congressman. he’s the deputy minority whip and was rumored to be on McCain’s VP list. annnd, he was an early leader of the House Republicans who vowed not to support the Bush administration’s $700 billion bailout of the financial system. but then, he wised up. Cantor is a rising star in a party that is about to be experiencing a power vacuum. and that means he’s a vicious bastard in a knife fight, he’s got sharp elbows and flexible morals, and he probably realized it will be politically beneficial for him to have had eventually supported the bailout. so he did. Cantor’s opponent is Anita Hartke, a real estate agent who joined her local democrats in Culpeper a couple of years ago, whose campaign strategy has been to cling deperately to the coattails of Mark Warner. she’s a lightweight. Hartke neve had a prayer and is fucked, and Cantor will cruise.

we also endorsed McCain, arguing that he’s the safer bet on national security issues. that means Iraq and Afghanistan, and Vladimir Putin. and also, because “Mr. Obama is the most liberal presidential candidate from a major party that this country perhaps has ever seen. His platform would tip us toward socialism.”
…. . I need a drink.
‘The Delta Force’ is on. fuck yes, it is. it has Ernest Borgnine, your boy Chuck Norris, Col. Trautman from ‘Rambo’, Lee ‘gutcheck’ Marvin, and a lot of stereotypes. it’s fucking great.
but you know, I’ve got no problem with people who vote for McCain because of national security. no, really. I disagree with it, and I’m sorry to hear that your vote is based on fear, but it’s your vote and that’s your prerogative. what really bothers me is the socialism thing.
“his platform would tip us toward socialism.” that’s the biggest crock of shit I’ve ever heard. he wants a fucking tax cut for people who don’t make a lot of money, and to cut the tax break for the wealthy. the wealthy act like this is the most unjust proposal in recorded history; no, asshole, it means your tax cut isn’t permanent, and it’s time for it to go away. you’re wealthy. even with higher taxes, you’ll still be wealthy.
but more to the point: Barack Obama Is A Socialist has only become an issue since the McCain campaign started screaming it after the Joe the Plumber fiasco. using it as an argument in a newspaper endorsement is intellectually lazy; I mean, it’s a newspaper endorsement, for christ’s sake. it’s supposed to focus on policy issues and voting records, not campaign soundbites. we’re supposed to recognize bullshit, which the socialism bit clearly is, and react accordingly. not doing so makes us look foolish.

I’ve been trying to write some ringing endorsement of Obama for some time now. I want to, but I wouldn’t really believe in it. that says a lot, I think, that I want to write it. but I don’t see it. I see a great speaker in him, but I don’t expect anything from him.
this has nothing to do with Obama personally. I expect nothing from McCain either. but as great a speaker as Obama is, his platform doesn’t really move me. should it? I want the war to end. and when it comes to the economy, I consider him less wrong than McCain, who doesn’t seem to know what the fuck he’s talking about. but does recognizing that McCain doesn’t know anything about economics make me an Obama supporter?
“less wrong.” jesus. see, beyond the war and the economy, there’s nothing I feel strongly about. everything else is trivial. it’s just a series of issues that I think Obama’s less wrong about than Mccain is. and that sucks, that I don’t believe in him. I want to; my fucking neighbors are gonna act like they won the lottery if Obama wins. I’m gonna shrug, and say, “better him than the other one.” everyone else seems so eager and excited and hopeful. so why the hell am I so pessimistic? I’m too young to be so politically jaded.
you know what is: I’m afraid that I’m going to vote against something and not for it. which is something that you’re often doing when you’re voting for Ralph Nader. and not doing that is something that’s important to me.
Obama’s gonna win, I think, and I believe that he’s a pragmatic man. he’s careful and he’s thoughtful. and because of this, I think he’ll recognize that to be a successful president — and that means a popular one, as well — he’ll govern from the center. this is why George Bush II isn’t a successful president. the center got him elected, but it wasn’t from where he governed; he governed from the fringe that used an act of terror to achieve some radical foreign policy they’d been scheming on for over a decade. and it didn’t work, because the fringe never works, and now Bush is almost universally reviled. and that’s how we’ll remember him, the son of a bitch. I hope he’s happy with himself.
on the other hand, McCain’s The Maverick, who’ll be forced govern from the center, because he certainly won’t have congressional support. but he’s also a foreign policy hawk, a cancer survivor in his seventies, and he picked a mediocre social conservative in Sarah Palin as his running mate. he did this only because the socially conservative wing of his party doesn’t like him, and you know this, because if he means it when he says that Obama’s not qualified to be president, then there’s no way he believes that Palin is. or he doesn’t care about qualifications at all. and what an asshole possibility that is. that bitch could be president.

so with that said. I know who I’m going to vote for. I’m going up to DC tomorrow, I think. I will cast my ballot early here before I leave, then I think Spencer is having a party on Tuesday night. I think Dave’s brother is gonna be getting himself arrested, or something like that. I’d like to see that. so I won’t be at home, so I won’t be writing anything until Wednesday.
I think Wednesday will be an interesting day.


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